Transcript of video

Hi, there. It’s Carolyn Ellis from carolynbellis.com and thank you so much for watching this short video. I’m really excited to share about this topic with you because it’s a bugaboo for me, New Year’s Resolutions. My topic for today’s video is “3 Ways to Make your New Year’s Resolutions ACTUALLY Happen”. 

Let’s face it – at the beginning of a New Year, it seems like it’s a blank slate. We’re programmed into thinking that we should have lots of resolutions and new plans, and make sure that we’ve got that clean slate. We’ve mapped it out just exactly the way we want our year to go. The fact is that only 8% of people actually do what they say they were going to do. By about mid-January, everybody’s fallen off the wagon, except for those hearty 8% of people. I’ve certainly been one of them too!

I know that it’s frustrating because we work so hard. We have this great intention and yet the reality is something different than what we thought it was going to be. So here are 3 tips I want to offer to you to help you make your New Year’s resolutions, whatever they may be, actually happen this year.

Tip 1 – Pick One Thing

The first thing is Pick One Thing. There’s an old proverb that says, “The person who chases 2 rabbits catches none.” I think this point was really driven home, and in a great way- it’s a great resource if you’re interested- is in Gary Keller’s The One Thing, The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results. 

Gary’s point is if you just pick that one leverage point and you focus until you carry it across the finish line, it helps you to actually harness your  energy, your attention, your resources, and the stamina it takes to get that thing done. It releases a lot of momentum and energy and belief in yourself that you can do it. It cascades and builds. So pick that one thing, put yourself all behind it, and then go for it. 

Tip 2 – Make Habits “Laughably Small”

The second tip is: Make those new habits “laughably small”. I love that term! “Laughably small” comes from Michael Bungay Stanier. What’s that little tiny baby step that you can do? For example, it might be to make your bed in the morning. Seriously, there is science and studies that show that people who make their bed in the morning have a different experience and more productive day than those who don’t. It could be something as simple as instead of jumping into my email first thing in the morning, I’m gonna start when I reach my desk at just having 5 slow, conscious deep breaths. 

Just start with that one laughably small little step. Don’t go for the whole huge enchilada all at once, because you’ll never be able to do it without a huge case of indigestion and frustration. 

When you’re taking that laughably small step, you’re just taking it on as an experiment. Have some fun. Have some curiosity about it. Give it 30 days and if it’s not working for you, tweak it, change it. You get to decide what’s gonna make that difference for me for this next year. 

Tip 3 – Watch Your Self-Talk

The third tip is so critical –  watch your self-talk.  When we are stepping into some new way of doing something or a new goal or something that we haven’t done before, naturally our inner critic is gonna go on high alert and start giving us all kinds of jabber, jabber, jabber. 

Your inner critic is not there to torpedo you. It’s there to say, “Ohh, I don’t understand this new space. I need to warn you. I need to haul you off.” “Ohh. You should have, would have, could have done this differently. ” “You should have done it sooner.” “You should do it later. “You shouldn’t do this at all.” “You’re too young.” “You’re too old. ” “You’re whatever.” You fill in the blank. 

That inner critic is gonna get you until you step back and you say, “Oh, excuse me? No, that’s not how we talk to ourselves. Let’s go do this thing. ” So, catching that inner critic in action and then immediately turning it around. 

I’ll give you an example. The other day I was just going to my office and I had one of those thoughts of, “Oh yeah, but you never…”  And immediately, in my head, I said “Aww you sweet little thing. That’s not how we’re going to be talking to ourselves.” And I just kept on walking. Treat yourself with the same kind of encouragement and loving kindness that you would a small child, an adorable puppy, an amazing person and human being that you are. 

So watch your self-talk. Keep your new habits laughably small, those baby steps, and pick the one thing. If you put all those together, you will have a huge impact on how you’re actually able to achieve those New Year’s resolutions. 

I hope this has been helpful for you, and feel free to drop me a line, send me a comment, ask me a question. 

I really appreciate your feedback and thanks for watching!