Have you ever been in a meeting where important issues were supposed to be discussed and decided, but you left the discussion with more questions and confusion than you had when you walked in?

Or perhaps you’ve sat through meetings or retreats where a few outspoken people dominated the conversation to the point where you just gave up trying to have any input?

The pace of change is accelerating every day. The new norm for organizations, both private and public sector, is to be able to expect and adapt proactively and resiliently to that change. But we’re not doing a great job at that, according to the 2013 Strategy&/Katzenback Center survey. It showed that 54% of change initiatives fail because of 3 primary reasons: change fatigue; a lack of skills organizationally to address the change; and a lack of input into the change from the front-line.

The way many organizations run important meetings and retreats isn’t helping them achieve success with change initiatives. Leaders and managers often earn that title because they’re good at their jobs, not because they’re great at facilitation or running a meeting. Leading a great meeting in a virtual or hybrid environment presents a whole bunch of new challenges, even for seasoned people leaders.

A skillful facilitator knows how to create the space and safety to have honest discussions about tough issues. She knows how to listen deeply and manage group dynamics effectively. He keeps his own ego in check and works with the group to tap into the wisdom of the participants, acting more as a “guide on the side” rather than a “sage on the stage.”

Bringing together people for an off-site retreat or an important discussion is a big investment of time, money and effort. There’s a big opportunity cost when you take people out of their daily responsibilities to focus on what Stephen Covey called “Quadrant 2” – things that are important, but not urgent. Yet ensuring that the time you dedicate to more strategic conversations is well-spent, and has momentum after the discussion is over is where many organizations fall short.

Here are 3 of the most common mistakes I’ve experienced with leaders running team meetings.

Mistake #1 – Be Clear Which Hat You Are Wearing

When managers run meetings, they are often in control of the agenda and the discussion. This makes eminent sense, but it’s a problem when you forget the power dynamics that are in play. When a leader actively speaks as a participant AND runs the meeting, it dampens the ability of others to contribute their ideas, especially if they are in conflict with the one their boss has just provided. Give your team space to grapple with the issues first. If you’re shifting from facilitator mode to giving direction as a team leader, let people know by saying “I want to put my manager hat on for a few minutes and bring this issue up.” If it’s an important discussion, and you want to participate and hear from everyone, consider hiring a trained outside facilitator to help you manage the session.

Mistake #2 – Listening to Respond vs Listening to Understand

When you’re leading a group discussion, it’s important to listen deeply to what others are saying. Often you move up the corporate ranks by being the one who contributes good ideas, asks great questions and has a reputation for being decisive. Those are great qualities on the promotion track, but they don’t necessarily translate well in facilitation.

Running a meeting isn’t about showing how smart or strategic you are. It’s really about listening to others – both their verbal and non-verbal contributions. It requires listening to understand diverse points of view, even if they don’t make sense to you as an individual.

Too often in our busy lives we listen and filter information based on what we already know. Our workplaces are so pressurized we try to save time by jumping in with answers before the question even gets asked. It can be uncomfortable and even confronting when you don’t have an answer or something is unclear, especially when you’re the one “in charge” and at the front of the room of people you lead.

Ensure you really are helping the group understand the nuances and complexity of people’s ideas by saying “So what I hear you saying is….” or “Can you help me to understand that better and say more?” Ensure your virtual participants also feel included and heard in the meeting. Leave space for people to think more deeply. Avoid the temptation to fill silence with your own opinion and give others the opportunity to step forward with their ideas.

Mistake #3 – Not Offering Closure and Next Steps

So often team meetings are driven by the clock and not by the outcome. The leader-as-facilitator needs to ensure there is proper pacing to the discussion. You need to manage the agenda and give people the confidence that there is an end point of resolution and action you’re leading the group towards.

Build in time at the end of a meeting to recap the key findings of the discussion and make sure everyone is clear on next steps. Those next steps also need to include who is taking responsibility for what, and have a sense of time frame for action attached to each action. If there’s more discussion that needs to happen, put it on the schedule while you have everyone in the room.

Pay attention to these and the chances you’ll have a more engaged and productive team, ready to face change and solve problems, will skyrocket! If you want even more support, my award-winning book, Lead Conversations that Count: How Busy Managers Run Great Meetings, is brimming with great frameworks and practical tips to help you take your meeting facilitation skills up a notch.